You stood yesterday because you were alive, you would stand tomorrow if it comes, be grateful for now because that is all you can boast of…..Okay he is gone now but there was life before him and there would still be one who knows may be a better one after.
I have come to realize that people are not bad but they have personality and mental disorders which is why they make wrong choices and those choices have consequences.
When you go into courtship and believe it is the right thing to do because the partner professes love, the undying one but if that same partner you come to realize expresses the same emotions to another, what makes you believe it’s you that is that special person and not the other person?
For this i say whilst professing the undying love and engaging your heart do not forget your brain...use it for it is the most vital tool of the trade.
When there are cracks on the wall be careful for the foundation may be in danger of subsidence it is a fact. Cracks do not appear on the wall for no reason.
I know love animates a true feeling of life and there is something about love that makes one wants to dive head first before thinking.
The role of all communication is action, if the love communicated to you is not backed up with action then you need to check it out if it is what he or she professes it to be.
Women in particular get too frustrated and desperate to get on with love some out of societal pressures and some because they believe the biological clock is fast ticking away.
Whatever the reason that made you sit tight for six years and get used to all the dirty socks, cheesy feet and the raw-like-smell emanating from the pants and all those years he has not said you are the one or you too have not been able to summed up the courage to say let’s get on with it because in your befuddled and beclouded mind it is not acceptable for a woman to propose to a man…….Your pastor said it is wrong and un-scriptural, your family said you are cheap to have done so, society and culture say it is not done because it is a man’s responsibility to be the hunter rather than the hunted.
If in all the six years that seems like forever to me none of you have seen the need so then maybe it is time to call it a day or even get on with it.
Six years of someone’s life into a casual relationship is no mean feat.
Personally I believe if two people agree to be together and have been able to define their needs and wants and why they believe they have to be together may be they should be allowed to be.
Our societies put too much onerous demands on marriage not minding if the couples involved are ready or prepared for such heavy commitments……needless to say marriage is a big commitment.
It is two people coming together, forgoing all other and ready to compromise and be prepared to let go of themselves and share their space, their life, and their emotions with another without fear or favor.
It is the pressure put on people that makes them rush in without being emotionally prepared and mentally ready.
It is that same pressure that makes them love with their hearts and forget to use their heads.
What would make friends that have been shagging each other in peace and harmony for six years and be married for just one year?
Seriously it does not make sense apart from society saying you must make that commitment.
Who says they were not committed for the past six years?.....Who says the punctilious demands by the society is what hones a union?..........I say people have to be ready and be prepared both mentally, emotionally and otherwise.
You see what I am saying once documents are signed people are under pressure to perform, they let go of their freedom to be human but now see themselves as married forgetting that married people are also humans.
And this nonsense about the man being the head and the woman the subordinate.........The pressure that the woman was broken away and out of his ribs and hence she must always be dependent on him and walk by his side dependently.
Hey! she was not taken from his ribs rather he came from her uterus……from She came a he, from the woman came the man…
I am not preaching equality or advocating the ideology on feminism neither am i perpetuating the perennial war of the sexes but rather that men should be real and keep it real.
We all have our space and a role to play let's play it fairly and in great harmony.
It takes two to tango, accept that, respect it and embrace it for that is how it is and would always be.
Marriage is a commitment between two people, a contractual agreement between a man and a woman and so it should be treated as such….It is rather not a master, indentured servitude arrangement……
Women are not servants or sub humans to be treated as such but humans with all the attributes of humans endowed on them perfectly……..
If you want a princess be the prince, If you want to be the knight in shining armor, make her the rainbow that beautifies the sky, be the change you want to see….
If you are a good man you will have the best woman nothing else would suffice.
If you try to be the vampire be ready to receive the gnat that would be gnawing you for as long as.
Women are the most gnomic creatures on earth the day men could decode that formula then there would be peace everlasting.
Daniela and Seyi......I am sorry you should have continued with your courtship rather than the commitment.
Courtship forever marriage for a day. Sadly!
Life goes on another one bites the dust
